Due To Recent Events I Have Hired A Bodyguard

It all started on Saturday. I was enjoying myself at the Fire Fire Fire Fest at Snafu 28. Outside a crackhead came up to me. Was I nervous? No. But he was harassing tens of people on the street. When he approached me he said, “look at this bitch.”

I smiled. I thought to myself, “That was a good one. He got me. No biggie.”

But this man did not like my smile so he approached me. I was uneasy. You see I have never been the one to throw a first punch. But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t protect myself.

I got shook internally. Externally cool as a cucumber. I had just thrown a successful party (thank you to everyone who came out.) The interaction eventually ended up with me telling the guy that I loved him until he was confused and walked away.

Today though was different. Walking in Port Authority going to a Dunkin Donuts I got to a line about the same time as another man. He probably beat me by two seconds. He went behind me. I thought, “Ok, nice guy and continued to listen to a podcast as I waited for my coffee. But when I approached the desk to order my drink he shouted, “YOU BEHIND ME!”

I looked baffled, froze and I became unsettled. He clearly wanted to fight. He even took off his bag. My defensive awareness was down. I got owned and stepped back like James Harden. I was not embarrassed. I was angry. I did not slave over this company for the last four years to get stabbed over coffee.

I am not a fighter. This doesn’t mean I can’t protect myself or anyone that I love. But I will not become Archduke Franz Ferdinand in my own story. I have hired a bodyguard. His name is Shaddy and you have to go through him to get to me.

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